The Ex-Flame Moves In

I dreamt that my ex-flame Giovanni (previously seen in my dream Indiana Jones and the Fake Moustache) was back and had apparently moved in with me, which is strange in and of itself, but even stranger when you consider the fact that I actually don't have a home at the moment and am staying with my parents for the time being after a recent break-up (with another guy). But in the dream my parents must have been living somewhere else, because it was just me and Giovanni in their house. I don't remember much about the events surrounding his move-in, but I remember that he took an interest to a cookbook that I'd won in a party game at a real-life Christmas party I'd been to on the night before my dreaming this. He thought the pictures in the book were very nice, and would like to try out some of the dishes, he said. We were doing fairly well together, Giovanni and I, which is completely unrealistic since I can't remember a time when he and I were ever doing well together, and I can't imagine that I'd have much tolerance for the guy at this point in my life.

After a couple of days, however, things started to go awry between us. Giovanni invited all of his friends over to watch soccer on TV with him, and he and his friends were extremely loud and annoying. They were drinking a lot of beer and kept screaming things at the screen whenever something happened in the game. At some point Giovanni even shouted something antisemitic at one of the players, which was when I lost it. I abruptly switched off the TV and started shouting at the top of my lungs at Giovanni and his friends. I was all THIS IS MY PLACE, DAMMIT! I WANT YOU ALL OUT OF HERE NOW! Then I rushed out of there, furious.

After a walk I had calmed down considerably, and for some reason I thought I ought to forgive Giovanni (because loud and annoying antisemites are so charming?), so I went back, although I felt confident that Giovanni would have left in anger by now. Sure enough; once I got back to the house, it looked completely different and Giovanni was nowhere to be found. Instead the cast of the TV-series The Wire season 1 were there. I started walking around, looking at all the characters. I saw Bubbles and felt glad - I'd missed him since I finished watching the first season. Suddenly, however, it wasn't me walking around, it was an attractive, African-American girl, and I noticed that someone who was kind of like D'Angelo, but not quite him, eyed the girl with interest. I thought to myself that this was probably meant as a kind of foreshadowing of a relationship between the two of them later on in the series.

Then somebody told me that Giovanni was up on the roof, so I went up there to see him. However, when I got up there, it wasn't Giovanni anymore, it was Queen Latifah (???), and she was throwing balls off the rooftop, AND SHE WAS NAKED! WTH? On the other side of the street there was a hotel, and the hotel manager shouted at me, gesturing at the naked Queen Latifah, saying "Will somebody please get her off of that rooftop?! She is offending my customers!"

Then I woke up.

The Early-'90s Ziggy Examination

Last night I dreamt that I was somehow Andrea Zuckerman from 90210. I was her within the fictional world of the series, meaning that it was also the early '90s again, and I was wearing ridiculous clothes, and my hair looked awful. I had to take an exam in The History of Modern Culture at the University - a class I finished several years ago in real life. I showed up for the examination which, as it turned out, was to take place within a big auditorium. Everyone who had to be examined on that day were present and seated in the rows of the auditorium and the various examinations took place on stage in front of everybody else.

I was really nervous, because as is usually the case in this kind of dream, I suddenly couldn't remember a thing from the curriculum. And I didn't know exactly when my examination would be, so I had to just stay put in the auditorium, which stressed me out even more. Finally, however, a list was handed around to everyone, with a schedule clumsily drawn with a pencil, stating when each examination would take place, and also what subject the examination would be on. I was happy to see that it was still two hours until my examination - but less than happy that it was apparently going to be on the subject of the cultural significance of the comic strip Ziggy!

I have to stop for a moment here and say how completely random I think it is that Ziggy has been part of a dream of mine. I think the comic strip is incredibly lame and unfunny and never think about it, and I can't imagine how my brain came up with it. Other than the fact that I think I associate Ziggy, as well as 90210, with the early '90s, because Ziggy was quite popular in Denmark around that time.

Anyway. I decided that the two remaining hours until my examination were best spent going home to try to get my texts and notes from the class of History of Modern Culture and see if I could find anything on the subject of Ziggy, or something akin to Ziggy. So I hurried home on my bike, and tried to find it all, but I couldn't really find half of the curriculum. I was able to find a book on the history of modern culture, but it only covered history up until about 1900, so I wasn't likely to find anything about Ziggy there. Eventually, I decided to lie down and have a nap.

When I awoke I was almost late for my examination, so I rushed back to the university and made it just in time. I was greeted by the examinating professor, who had an announcement to make: "Ladies and Gentlemen, I would like to encourage you not to make your examinations too wordy. All my little brothers and sisters are going on dates, so I am in a bit of a hurry." You see, as it turned out, the professor had a bunch of poor ghetto kids to take care of, kind of like Wallace has in The Wire. I'm not sure how I even knew this.

Before the actual examination began, however, the scene was cut, and the next scene showed Andrea sitting on the beach. She was carving something into a stone that she'd picked up - an "A". I was no longer Andrea at this point, I was sort of watching her from outside, but I took this to mean that Andrea had been given an A. Suddenly Brandon Walsh came walking and sat down beside Andrea, asking her how things went. She told him, and he looked at his watch and noted that she'd been examined for an hour and fifteen minutes.

For some reason, the absurdity of this set-up suddenly dawned on me in the dream, and so I decided to interrupt Andrea's and Brandon's conversation by going all meta on their asses, laughingly telling them: "Hold on a minute, Andrea: You were talking for an hour and fifteen minutes about Ziggy? Jesus Christ, that is the most typically early-'90s thing I've ever heard, right there. Andrea Zuckerman telling Brandon Walsh about her examination on Ziggy the comic strip. I'm telling you guys, you may not realize this yet, but someday you are going to look back and know that this was the most extremely early-'90-ish moment of your entire lives."

And then I woke up.

The German Museum Custodian - Pt.1

This is dream which sits pretty squarely between WTF and random. I was at some seaside museum with two girls upon whom I had a crush about 15 years ago. We were walking around looking at the exhibition when I stumble upon a rather large scale model of Berlin. The model was inside a display case nested upon some sand. I, having lived in Berlin, was excited, and hoped to find my old house. Trying to get a good overview, I rested my hand on some of the sand which led the eastern part of Berlin collapsing.
This was of course a huge embarrassment, and I desperately tried to cover up my accident, but before I could repair the model a very German looking custodian arrived.

"WAS!?" he said, pointing at me. I mumbled some sort of a reply in German to which he did not react. After a few seconds of awkward silence another "WAS!?" pierced the room. At this point I was getting desperate, and started shoving the sand back into the model stand. This was of course to no avail, and suddenly more and more of the city started collapsing. "WAS?!" - the custodian was now pointing at the rather large hole in the model which was expanding at a steady rate. To my amazement the hole appearing inside the model led into a cave where some sort of skeleton could be seen. The custodian who was busy “WAS!?”'ing everything happening did for some reason not see me go down into the. The skeletons were of two giant deer like creatures. Perfectly intact and rather well detailed.
My phone then rang and a voice informed me that the director of the football club Brøndby IF Per Bjerregaard had bought the museum – this was gonna make money! I was thus rather happy with me discovery and even more when I noticed the HUGE dolphin next to the skeletons. We're talking a dolphin over 2 meters wide! It started jumping up and down, urging me to pet it. I then did that until another “WAS!?” could be heard and then I awoke. Heart beating and drenched in sweat.

Look forward to the highly unlikely return of the WAS!?-man in this German Museum Custodian two-parter!

Harrison Ford, Pierce Brosnan, and The Elephant Man

I had a dream some time last week in which I was still with my ex-boyfriend Jonas (a relationship that ended years ago). This is a recurrent dream scenario of mine, and in the dream I’m always in a state of panic, because I don’t want to be with him, I don’t understand how I even got back together with him, and I want to break it off, but I worry about hurting his feelings all over again. I was thinking about these things in this dream while I was hanging around in some kind of house. My mother was there, and we were discussing something or other. Suddenly, however, my mother left, and in walked Harrison Ford! And we’re talking young Harrison Ford here. Like, Harrison Ford from before I was even born. Hot.

For no apparent reason, Harrison Ford walked over to me and started kissing me. As already mentioned, he was hot, so I was all for that, until I remembered that I was still with Jonas, and then I felt terrible and freed myself from Harrison Ford's tender embrace. I walked out of the room – only to realize that the house I’d been in all along was Jonas’ house! And that he was sitting in a pink office chair in the room facing the one I was just in with Harrison Ford! Meaning that he’d had a clear view of what I’d been up to in there. I walked up to Jonas and tried to be all casual about it, thinking that just maybe Jonas didn’t see any of it after all. However, Jonas was looking glum and hurt and poignantly told me: “I demand to know why you were kissing Harrison Ford just now!” Which, when you think about it, is a sentence you get to hear much too rarely in every-day conversation.

I don’t remember how I managed to get out of that situation, but soon after I found myself in the kitchen of that same house, along with Jonas, Jonas’s mother, and Jonas’s younger sister. Jonas does not even have a younger sister in real life, but in this dream he did, and she was about eleven or twelve years old. Jonas’s mother knew all about the Harrison Ford incident, so things were incredibly awkward. Also, there was a television on in the kitchen, and we were watching the news. On the news it was announced that actor Pierce Brosnan had died. The anchorman explained that Brosnan had for years suffered badly from the same disease that the Elephant Man had in David Lynch's movie: Big tumors grew all over his face and made him look completely deformed. They showed a picture of him from during his illness, and he looked terrible. Somebody moved to switch off the television, worried, I believe, that Jonas’s little sister might be disturbed by the images. However, the little sister suddenly piped up, asking us to leave the television on, because she, so she said, had been a great fan of Pierce Brosnan and had for years been sending him implants for his face, and also other things, among these decorative little pushpins, trying to encourage him in his weakened state, so it meant a lot to her to hear his obituary on the news. And that is the last thing I remember from the dream.

McNulty wanting more

I have been enjoying the excellent HBO series The Wire lately - Doing a 6 episode marathon on sunday. The second season is a thriller from the get go!

In my The Wire related dream I was having a candlelight dinner (This being featured in one the episodes, I as far as I remember) with one of the chief protagonists Jimmy McNulty (left of picture). McNulty is a rebel detective playing things his own way and one who does not shy away from the whisky bottle. In the dream, at the the candlelight dinner, in a marina, McNulty was running me through the major plot lines of The Wire, telling what it all meant, where it was going and so forth. It of course made perfect sense in dreamland, but I woke before I could get a real grasp of what he was saying. McNulty - I guess - will be dissapointed not getting anywhere with me, and I'm counting myself happy it wasn't Bunk (right of picture) who wanted to run me through the mill.

Juliette Lewis and The Big Chill

I dreamt last night that Martin, my co-blogger, wanted me to watch some movie with him that Juliette Lewis had directed. It turned out to be a kind of comedy-drama about a group of hipster 40-something artists who all met up at this big house. It seemed to be somewhat akin to The Big Chill, thematically: A group of old friends meeting up and reflecting on how their lives turned out. Gillian Anderson was one of the actresses. Juliette Lewis was also in the movie herself. For some reason, every actress in the movie had the same haircut and hairdye as Juliette Lewis (shoulderlength, and dyed red).

I don't remember anything from the story, apart from one of the characters, possibly the one played by Gillian Anderson, showing the others old pictures from this one time in the late sixties when she was hanging out with John Lennon in some kind of garden. John Lennon was naked in the pictures and looked terrible, just like on the cover of Two Virgins.

There were also a few cameos of some sculptures that Martin informed me were also done by Juliette Lewis who apparently did some sculpturing on the side. I commented that Juliette Lewis is also a singer in a band (which she is, in RL) and dryly told Martin that I thought Juliette Lewis ought to just sit down and make a decision about what kind of artist she wanted to be.

Russian Communist Invasion - A Bruce Springsteen Bio-pic

Last night I had a dream that I had been cast as Patti Scialfa in a bio-pic about Bruce Springsteen! I bear no resemblance to Patti Scialfa in real life, but in my dream I looked almost exactly like her – red hair and everything. Bruce Springsteen played himself in the movie, so I was to play opposite the boss, and I was thrilled. The first scene I remember from the dream was a scene that was supposed to depict Bruce's and Patti's first meeting. The meeting took place during a festival at a Danish beach, and for some reason Patti was in disguise (perhaps it was a "Brilliant Disguise"?), wearing a long, smooth, blond wig, so Bruce didn't know who she was, but fell in love with her regardless. I don't remember much from the scene, other than thinking that I looked downright bizar in that wig.

The next scene I remember in more detail: It was the scene in which Bruce's first wife was supposed to find out about Bruce and Patti having an affair. In the scene, Bruce and I were supposed to be seated in one of the rows at a Bruce Springsteen concert – which doesn't make much sense, I know, but it seemed perfectly reasonable to me while I was dreaming it. Patti and Bruce were holding hands, but Bruce's first wife noticed, because she was seated right next to them, and that's how she found out. I found it an awe-inspiring experience to be holding hands with The Boss, but apart from that I was very skeptical of the scene. I didn't think it seemed like a very realistic way for Bruce's wife to find out about the affair.

Before I could voice this concern, however, the concert hall was invaded by Russian communists. They captured everyone there, including me, Bruce and Bruce's first wife, and intended to take us away to a gulag. At this point I wasn't really able to discern between fiction and reality, and I think I'd pretty much become Patti Scialfa by now. In this state, I remember thinking vaguely how very awkard it was going to be to be at the same gulag as Bruce's ex-wife, thus obviously displaying a disturbingly bad sense of proportions.

The Russian communists lined us up outside the concert hall in what looked like a typical Danish autumn countryside landscape. A muddy road stretched out before us, pastures of green grass and trees with fading leaves on both sides of it. I was a little distraught at the prospect of going to a gulag, but I figured things couldn't get too bad as long as I had The Boss right next to me. I felt confident that he'd find a way for us to escape. was wearing wellingtons and noticed that my feet were getting cold inside the clammy rubber material, and I fretted somewhat about the fact that I hadn't had the presence of mind to put on my winter boots instead. It's bound to get cold at that gulag, I figured. I did take some comfort in the fact that all the other prisoners lined up beside me had put on wellingtons as well. Then I woke up.

The Thesis Defense

I dreamt last night that I was about to hand in my thesis. (I am in fact writing my thesis at the moment, however, I am not supposed to hand it in till February.)

30 minutes before I turned it in, I was suddenly informed that I was expected to give a defense of my thesis on that same occassion. I have always been told that there will be no defense - my thesis will be graded solely on the basis of my thesis paper. So I was very surprised and somewhat alarmed to find out about this, especially because I was told that I had to give my defense in English (which is only my second language), preferrably in a Welsh accent. I knew for sure that I wasn't going to be able to pull off a Welsh accent, but even without the accent I couldn't see how I was ever going to be able to put together a defense in 30 minutes, and I was very nervous.

To make matters worse, I was constantly distracted by my surroundings and couldn't find the time to sit down and actually get something down on paper or put together a power point show or whatever. I found myself at a huge castle-like building, and somehow I ended up in a public bathroom in the basement where there were a row of showers. My elementary school teacher was there for some reason, and she showed me into one of the shower stalls. Unlike the other stalls, it was locked, but she had a key and opened the door. It was a cold, damp, room with white tiles on the walls, and the and the shower in this particular stall looked more like the interior for an old silent movie about a mad scientist conducting ruthless experiments in his lab than a shower: Underneath the shower a big cage-like thing, made of dark, massive iron was erected. My old teacher told me that the shower had been built in the 1920s as a special shower for children who were stricken with polio-induced paralysis. My teacher's own sister had apparently had polio, and my teacher had often helped her to use the shower, sitting in the cage which would hold the paralysed child upright while the water poured down on her. My teacher then showed me a short music video she had made with one of my old class mates from elementary school, in which the kid was seated in the cage, while classical music played. It was a strangely beautiful video, meant to thematicize the difficulties of being young and different, and I commended her on it.

All this took up so much of my time that I actually never got around to writing my thesis defense, and I woke up before I ever got to the part where I had to give the defense.

Indiana Jones and the Fake Moustache

Last night I dreamt that I was in an Indiana Jones movie. On the fictional level at that - I was one of the characters. I'm not entirely sure what my part in the movie was, but a real-life ex-flame of mine, Giovanni, was also in the movie, as the villain.

The rest of the characters included Indiana Jones, Indiana Jones's father Henry Sr. (as played by Sean Connery) and Willie from Temple of Doom, and the artefact they were after in this movie was some kind of holy/magic book, possibly the Bible. To open the book, however, you had to find some kind of rock and a fake moustache (?).

Indy had succesfully retrieved these two objects somewhere in Syria and in the scene I remember most clearly, Indy, Willie and I were opening the book by putting the rock into some kind of hole and then placing the fake moustache next to the book. However, the book proved to be so powerful that it started burning after Indy opened it, flames emerging from its pages. Being mineral, the rock was unharmed by the fire, but the flames quickly devoured the fake moustache, and this caused Indy to worry: Henry Sr., who was not in this scene, had been after the rock, the fake moustache and the book for years, and Indy dreaded having to tell his father that he'd managed to destroy the fake moustache.

This was the set-up for the subsequent scene where Indy was reunited with his father and had to tell him what happened. He gleefully told him about the book and the rock, but hemmed and hawed like a nervous schoolboy when he came to the part about the fake moustache. He finally admitted that the moustache had burned, but to everyone's surprise, Henry Sr just. shrugged it off: "Of courshe it burned, Junior, it'sh a moustache! What did you exshpect!" he said in that Sean Connery way of his. As it turned out, you could use any old fake moustache you wanted to open the book - it was only the rock that mattered. Duh!

There was also a scene in which Willie had some dialogue, but I don't remember what she said. All I remember is that I noticed that she seemed to have undergone a personal development and become more mature than she was in Temple of Doom. In a very meta moment, I made a mental note to myself to remember to post an entry about this on the imdb message board for the movie. Being the girly girl that I am, I also noticed that she looked a lot prettier than she did in Temple of Doom: She was wearing a stylish red and black dress and her curls were softer and less frizzy.

Finally there was the last scene of the movie. In the scene, Giovanni, Henry Sr and I were all present while Indy bid Willie a tender goodbye, and Willie said: "Well, gee, Indy, thanks for all the adventures then... and, well, thanks for all the sex, I guess." A very random and inappropriate thing to say with everyone standing about, and Giovanni, Henry Sr and I all gave each other looks of WTF. Willie shrugged at our reaction and exclaimed "Well...!", and that's the last thing I remember from the dream. Something tells me that nobody is going to call me up and ask me to be a co-writer for the Indy 5 script.

The Leech

The following events take place in a Chinese industrial harbor at around midnight. The setting is foggy and cold, although I am quite aware of wearing shorts. Walking along with my friend Kenneth Goldbaum we reminisce on old parties. One event is especially interesting, another friend was once bit by a leech in the toe which was rather disgusting; We talk back and forth about this subject, until we stumble upon a Chinese fisherman. Kenneth approaches the man and asks him whether he has any planes for that leech lying on the ground, and if not could Kenneth have it.
Obviously, the fisherman has no interest in the leech and lets Kenneth have it. Kenneth joyously picks up said leech and juggles it around in his hand. I warn him that it might attach itself to him which it of course does. Rather than struggle to remove the leech Kenneth just lets it sit there. Sucking blood it quickly grows quite large and purple. Kenneth enjoying himself starts to wave the leech attached finger at me. For some reason I am now carrying a folded chair which I use to fend of Kenneth and the leech finger.
Kenneth amused by the leech starts to push his finger inside the leech - not in a sexual way - Just poking at the rubbery substance and pulling it over his finger. The dream then ends abruptly.